You’re Only 10 Once

I believe that our adult notions concerning birthdays are largely shaped by our childhood birthday experiences. I come from a family of 5 siblings. My mother had a tendency to bend over backward to make our birthdays nice, oftentimes to the point of adding undue stress to everyone’s lives. My father was her equal opposite. While he was always a solid with a $50 dollar bill on your B-day, I also distinctly remember him informing me that birthdays are like assholes. Everybody has one. I fall somewhere in the middle, which isn’t necessarily a good thing.
Micah’s birthday, May 27th, always falls on one of the busiest weekends of the year. Memorial Day Weekend. Baseball games, parades, picnics, camping. It’s been 10 years, you would think that we would have this figured out by now, but Chris and I pride ourselves on our ability to learn at our own pace…which is apparently rather slowly.
In preparation for Micah’s birthday, I had been probing Chris about gift ideas. Topping last year would be difficult considering we got him the exact 4 items that he asked for despite the fact that we couldn’t afford it. With Chris finishing up nursing school and cutting back on work we are trying to stick to a budget. Knowing that I have a tendency to jump on Amazon and make people’s birthday dreams come true to the demise of our one income budget, Chris was spearheading the gifts this year.
The week before the birthday we pull up to one of Flynn’s (12) baseball games. I remain seated while I decide what to do with multiple sleeping people in the suburban. Chris looks at his phone a moment and then proceeds to get out of the vehicle and approach a car that I don’t recognize. I watch from a distance while Chris performs a shady (not actually that shady, but creative license…) Facebook yardsale Rollerblade transaction. I was slightly impressed. Until I saw them. I know I don’t have to explain to any other moms out there the “constant awareness of the size of your boy’s goon feet” phenomenon. You are the first one to be alerted when shoes are too small and you are constantly on the hunt for future shoes at a decent price because they will most likely be disintegrated under the consistent pressurized force of BOYHOOD! So, really nice rollerblades, definitely too small. Chris argued me on the topic right up until Micah discovered them prematurely in Chris’ vehicle and tried them on. I was right. Insert Micah’s light disappointment [HERE].
I again pressured Chris to just let me have my way with the gifting. He insisted that he had another surprise up his sleeve. And that he did.
Saturday the 26th, the day before Micah’s actual birthday, Chris had all 6 kids while I worked my 5 hours a week at The Square Antiques in Schaefferstown. (This can affectionately be referred to as my weekly vacation.) Being the fabulous dad that he is, he took everyone to the Annville Memorial Day Parade. Afterward, they went and intercepted a gas powered scooter that was once again acquired in some type of backwoods trade. Some old scaffolding for a running motor scooter from a friend. I am falling more in love with my husband with every word I write. He called me at work to let me know it was done. The BIRTHDAY HAPPINESS had arrived! Chris told me the boys were all taking turns and Micah was thrilled. They were presently at our friends’ recreational camp land where we keep a camper parked year round. Multitudes of kids enjoying Micah’s birthday gift with him. My only regret was having not been there to see that initial joy.
I went home after work to prepare Micah’s favorite dessert. Dirt Pudding with gummy worms and flowers galore. When I arrived at camp I was surprised to find that there were no smiles. No birthday happiness. The scooter broke after only an hour. Insert Micah’s immense disappointment [HERE].
“Welp, this Dirt Pudding better be pretty fantastic, cause that’s it!” My words to Chris as I became almost as disappointed as Micah at the sudden turn of events. I softly cried in our camper while Chris and I did a crappy job of spooning dirt pudding into 30 plastic cups. Micah put on a brave face for the next 18 hours (no he didn’t, if he wasn’t sleeping he was frowning) until we left camp with the intention to go home, clean ourselves up and SALVAGE MICAH’S BIRTHDAY!
I think we are finally to the point in our child rearing that we recognize that for every “birthday budget”, there needs to also be an “emergency birthday disaster budget” for when every single thing we planned has tanked hard.
We headed to the Batdorf where Micah spilled and broke not ONE but TWO glasses of root beer. #1 reason our kids only drink water when we eat at restaurants, but it was the birthday salvage! SODA ALL AROUND! Poor Micah. You know when you look at your kid cause you’re like “Are you even kidding?!” but then you can see on their face that they are not, in fact, kidding and they did have two horrific accidental spills in a row. After the second root beer incident Flynn looked at me and said, “I feel like I’m on a roller coaster that I’m really scared to be on right now…like…in my stomach.” Welcome to my life Flynn. After our nerves settled, Micah was presented with a substantial dessert and the combined melodies of the Batdorf staff and his family singing Happy Birthday before we were off to Harrisburg to the trampoline park where we finished the evening with high spirits.
The next day we attended the Lebanon Memorial Day Parade. Micah is a parade enthusiast, so I do feel quite strongly that his birth on this particular holiday weekend was no coincidence. We watched Owen (7) and Flynn walk with their baseball teams in the parade and afterward headed in the direction of my in-laws home in Maryland. We needed to retrieve our daughter Iris (12) who had attended a wedding and was absent from all birthday festivities. My in-laws always make our children feel very special on their birthdays. A cookout, a cake, a gift. They are consistently a source of birthday joy for our kids and it’s nice to know that if we really blow it, hopefully, the grandparents can pick up the slack.
After blowing out his candles Micah was presented with a very large box. He was so excited to tear through the paper. There they were. Some REALLY NICE ROLLERBLADES! Having heard about the rollerblade debacle, my father-in-law went the extra mile and got him a pair from a real store! Once again though, while I watched him pull them from the box, I laid my eyes on them and knew they were too small. Not a big deal, because at least they could be exchanged with the receipt. I, however, couldn’t watch Micah go through one more light disappointment. I went to the bathroom for a moment. When I reemerged I heard Chris say, “OOOO, a women’s size 7.” Micah still left with a smile on his face, knowing we would be taking him to the sporting goods store to exchange his really nice women’s roller blades for a pair of really nice men’s roller blades. And we did, the next evening.
I guess Micah’s birthday has helped to re-shape my idea of “birthdays”. Going forward I believe that Krouse children need to fully expect their birthday to be the single most character building day of their year. While we, your parents will never intentionally fill the day with disappointment, awkward moments and broken gifts, we also admit that we just can’t make any promises. We had you and we’ve kept you around this long so surely you must know our great love for you, but we don’t do well under pressure so please forgive us for all of your past, present and future birthdays.